6 Most Common Causes of Anger Issues
Compared to positive emotions such as happiness, hope, gratitude, and amusement – anger is considered to be a negative emotion which is not true at all.
This is also common for people to connect anger with destruction and violence. However, it is important to note that anger is not a negative emotion that we must get rid of.
Just like every other emotion, anger is a normal and necessary human emotion. It shows that humans can recognize injustice or wrongdoing and stand up against it.
Anger also shows the survival instinct of humans. For instance, they feel angry toward their enemies, which motivates them to fight, emerge victorious and save themselves.
Besides that, anger motivates us to work towards resolving issues, and when it happens, we enjoy a calming feeling that we value more after constantly feeling angry.
So, the goal is never to do away with anger fully but to learn to express it in a positive manner – in a constructive manner that focuses on resolution instead of inflicting pain and causing violence.
Almost 64% of Americans strongly agree that people, in general, are getting angrier. In fact, it is true that 1 in 10 Americans are reported to have severe anger issues. The question arises as to why this is the case. Therefore, in this article, we look at what causes anger and some ways to deal with it.
When Does Your Anger Become a Problem?
Anger becomes problematic when you lose control while you are under its influence. Losing your senses to anything is never beneficial, as is the case with anger.
You can do anything when you lose control over yourself during an angry outburst. You are unable to think straight and say hurtful things to others. You can humiliate, taunt, criticize, yell at, verbally abuse, and even physically hurt them.
Of course, you regret it later, but it is too late as it has already hurt others, ruining your reputation in their eyes and your relationship with them. This is when anger becomes a problem.
What are the Causes of Anger Issues?
Knowing the causes of anger issues is essential to recognize them and calm yourself down when you find yourself in such situations before it’s too late.
The following are the common causes of anger:
- Your Childhood Experiences and Upbringing
- Repressed Trauma
- Unresolved Grief
- Alcohol Abuse
- Mental Health Disorders
1. Your Childhood Experiences and Upbringing
Many of who we become as adults depend upon our childhood experiences and upbringing. If children face abuse and neglect by their parents and caretakers, they may develop anxiety and anger issues as adults.
If they grow up in a hostile environment where parents are constantly angry at each other and lash out at their kids for the slightest mistakes, they may imitate that behavior and get angered easily when they grow up.
Similarly, suppose their parents have an authoritarian parenting style, where the children are not allowed to have childish fun, make mistakes, and express themselves in whatever way they want. In that case, they may learn to suppress their emotions, eventually causing them to get frustrated and angry.
2. Repressed Trauma
Healing from trauma could look different for individuals, but it is necessary to live an emotionally fulfilling life. Not being able to express the pain that the trauma caused you and avoiding talking about it can suppress it. The trauma doesn’t go away but is just suppressed, waiting to manifest itself given the opportunity.
One way that repressed trauma peeks through is through anger. People who have not been able to deal with repressed appropriately can come across as always angry and frustrated, ready to lash out at any instant.
3. Unresolved Grief
Just like other emotions, grief also needs expression. The chronic illness of a loved one or sudden death can create emotional havoc in a person’s life. Nobody knows how much time each individual needs to overcome that loss and for the grief to subside.
You must allow yourself that. If you don’t do that, your grief can exhibit itself as anger. This causes great harm as people begin to become scared of you and distance themselves, not realizing that you need emotional support all this while.
Stress could be because of any difficulty in life. It could be because of your parent’s deteriorating health and your inability to do anything for them. It could be because of spousal or romantic relationships, where you and your partner are not meeting each other’s expectations, leading to constant heartbreaks and arguments.
It could be because your child is beginning to show signs of rebellion in their teenage years. It could be because of professional difficulty or financial issues. Whatever the reason may be, being stressed at some point in life is natural. However, if stress is not managed appropriately, you can get increasingly frustrated and develop anger issues.
5. Alcohol Abuse
We all know this one. It does not just happen in movies. There are too many individuals who have lost themselves or their loved ones to alcohol abuse. The person is still there physically, but they become a different person when under the influence of alcohol.
They become angry and lash out at others, and they can even get violent and break things. It is important to get help for alcohol abuse before it becomes too severe and the person begins to develop different types of anger issues.
6. Mental Health Disorders
Anger is one of the most common symptoms of mental health disorders like depression, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and Intermediate Explosive Disorder.
It is because the person sees that their mental health is deteriorating and yet they can’t do anything. Feelings of helplessness are often conveyed as frustration and anger.
How to Deal with Anger?
As we said earlier, the goal should never be to never feel angry again. Instead, the goal should be to learn to appropriately express anger – a manner that turns out more constructive than aggressive.
So, how should you deal with anger? Sensibly and with a present mind. Of course, it is easier said than done but consider it as adopting a habit or mastering a skill.
It’s difficult at the beginning, but it gets easier with practice and time. It also helps if you ask yourself, “What causes anger issues?” and recognize what triggers anger. Once you know the root cause of anger, you can smartly tackle it.
Some tips to help you deal with anger better are:
- Deep breaths: When you begin to feel angry, remove yourself from that place and people and take some conscious slow breaths. It helps dissipate the tension settling in your muscles and calms your nerves down.
- Go for a walk: Going for a walk when you feel worked up is an excellent way to manage anger. It not only evaporates your anger but also helps you self-reflect and gain some perspective that you would not have been able to get while having a fit of anger.
- Take An Anger Management Class: Sometimes, you need expert guidance. You can enroll yourself in an anger management class that helps you understand the causes of anger. The course is designed to teach people the tools and techniques they need to manage their anger effectively. More than 10000+ students have already completed this program.